The Cure

I just had a pleasant walk home from class/lunch. Sometime in between getting out of class and eating lunch it started to pour down rain. I had ridden my bike to class, but brought my umbrella along in case this happened. So I left my bike locked up in front Carrol Science and started to walk back to my apartment. Actually, it wasn't pouring, just regular raining, until I got to about Moody Library. Then it really started coming down. I pulled my umbrella down as close to my head as I could manage; I'm wearing a light blue tshirt and realized how transperant it would be when wet. I gave up on trying to keep my pants dry, and they were sloshing around my ankles. By the time I got to the SLC, I had almost fallen a couple times because my sandals were slippery, and so I just decided to take them off. At first I thought, "People are going to think I'm weird--walking around without shoes. They're going to think I'm hippie, or worse, that I'm trying to be a hippie." But then I thought, "So?" and did it anyway (more on that later). So I walked the rest of the way shoeless, not even trying to avoid the big puddles anymore. Fifteen minutes after I started, I got back to my apartment. My pants were drenched to about my thigh, and so I changed into dry capris and here I am.

It's was a nice walk.

Yesterday I read an article in The Oprah Magazine called "The Cure for Self-Conscious: It's one word--one little word--but it has revelatory power." Obviously this intrigued me. Aren't you intriqued? Wanna know the word? Don't you want to be freed from self-consciousnees? Empowered to follow your instincts and not care what people think? It's something "so lucid, so mind expanding, so simultaneously Socratic and Zenlike, that I was mesmorized on the spot."
That's it.

"If I say what I really think, people might disagree with me."

"If I go out to eat lunch by myself I might look like a loser."

"If I can't run on the treadmill as long as the person next to me, they are going to think I'm out of shape and think they are better than me."

"If I go talk to that cute boy I don't know, he might think I'm weird."

"If my house is slightly messy when I have people over, they're going to realize that I'm not perfect, that I am slightly human and slightly busy."

"If I walk home in the rain holding my shoes in my hand rather than wearing them on my feet, people might think I'm a hippie, or worse, that I'm trying to be a hippie."

There. Now you're freed.


While I'm being all empower-y, let me share with you this quote I ran across.
"Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself."

You should paint that on a piece of wood all prettily. I bet it'd sell.

A website

No One Belongs Here More Than You

I haven't read this book, but I like its website.


Sometime during this weekend, while I was away, my sheets disappeared. My bed is made, but my comforter and pillows are the only things on it. I just noticed this. Granted, they weren't even my sheets to begin with, they are Claire's, but it's weird that they're just . . . gone. They up and left without leaving so much as a note. And they were so soft. I thought we had something special going on. I spent so many nights with them. I feel so used.

In other news, on a spontaneous whim I've dropped my session two summer classes and am now going home for the month of July. That's just what I want to do. It's not that much of a whim, really. I've been thinking about it for a couple weeks, but I voiced these thoughts only a few days ago and so it looks spontaneous to the uninformed observer. Doesn't it seem more fun when it's spontaneous? So that's the story I'm sticking with.

So, I got a 55 on the Brit Lit paper I turned in last Thursday. And you want to know the only reason why? Because I wrote 710 instead of 750 words. Forty flippin' words! I got a 55 even though "the essay is strong in every other category." That's ridiculous. So I emailed my professor and tactfully told him that he's ridiculous. I'll let you know how it goes. Erg. The funny thing, is that I'm not really that concerned about it. I wouldn't care that much if it stayed a 55. I feel like I should care more. Hm.

Mucho excitedo

A shower, a clean set of clothes, and freshly shaven legs feel oh so good. Plus, I bought new deodrant that has a "Cool Cucumber" fragrance that I can smell on myself as I'm sitting here. Yum.

My bike is all better. I now know how to change the tube in a bike tire. I am capable.

It's been a good day. Also because I have the John Mayer/Ben Folds concert to look forward to this Friday. Woot! I'm mucho excitedo about that. I'm listening to John right now, he's having a stupid mouth.

That is all.

Good news.

My car is fixed! Yay! Timmy is back and all better, with new windshield wiper blades and everything. I don't have to bum off people for rides now. I can buy groceries! Life is good.

I felt like I had more to say, but I guess I don't.

Complimentary colors

Disclaimer: The following post is slightly cheesy. In it I talk about the m-word (marriage) which I try not to do too much because I'm at Baylor and there are so many girls here who are after it and I so don't want to be one of those. Just know that I have no notions of getting married anytime soon and am perfectly happy how I am. That said, you may read on.

So last night some friends and I were discussing relatioships--marriage, dating ,and the like--and pondering together what it all meant and what we think marriage is suppose to be like. It's something I kept thinking about as I was trying to sleep, when I came up with this analogy that I think helps me, at least. Maybe a marriage works the same way as complementary colors. Apart, the two colors don't cease to exist, they are still lovely and alive and . . . colorful. But when you put said color with its complementary, both are brightened and, well, complemented. Just by being together, they are brighter and do their job as colors better than they do it apart. Like I said, that doesn't mean they aren't colors when they are apart, it's just that together, they do so much better. That would then lead one to believe that, like a color has only one complementary (for red it's green; for blue it's orange; purple, yellow), there is only one person out there that is your complementary, which I don't know if I buy. Of course there are limits to every analogy.

It was just something I was thinking about.

In other news, Rach and I layed out by the pool for the first time this summer yesterday, and now I'm rather burned. It was still fun though; it felt like summer. Last night we went to Target and procured new swimsuits and now I'm anxious to hit the pool again, though I know I should probably give my skin a rest.

Sometimes I feel like a snob, because I like to use words like "procured" instead of "purchased" or throw in a "whilst" here and there instead of "while." It spices things up, no?

. . . gorillas?

Check out this picture. Its caption reads, "Contestants gathered at the starting line, getting ready for the first-annual San Francisco Great Gorilla Run that began in Golden Gate Park just near the bandshell Sunday. Over 400 people, dressed as gorillas, ran a race to raise funds for mountain and low land gorillas threatened in the Congo, Uganda and Rwanda. Chronicle photo by Brant Ward"" (here's a link if you want to see more photos.) I thought that was interesting.

My car was towed earlier this morning. It's all out of my hands now, which is kind of a relief. And remember when I was saying how thankful I was to have a good bike to fall back on? Well, I certainly jinxed myself with that--now the back tire of my bike if deflated and won't take air. I guess it needs a new tube, but I need a car to go get one and remedy the problem. Now I'm stuck with my two feet and the benevolence of my friends. Oh well. So goes life. It's all pretty funny actually. Last week pretty much everything I own that plays a significant part in my day-to-day life had problems, I already mentioned my car and bike, but my laptop and phone also were being finicky. I keep telling myself that they are all luxury items anyway and I need to stop complaining. Things could be so much worse. I could be dying. And I'm not, as far as I know. Heck I get to go to flippin' Italy in a couple months, life can't be all that bad.


This picture is disturbing. It's a turtle deformed by a plastic band that the he got tangled in when he was young, taken by Gregg Segal. I found it on an old post on No Impact Man's blog (look to your right for a link). Doesn't it hurt your heart a little?

What do you do with that? Stop using plastic all together? That doesn't seem feasible. Nothing does. I feel like nothing I do will actually matter, in the grand scheme of things. But I guess if everyone thought that about everything, nothing would ever change. I can't solve the problem. I guess it's just a matter of chosing if I want to be apart of the problem or the solution.

I hate cars.

I hate them. They're overrated and require too much attention, time, and money. Sure, the arguement could be made that they save one time by making transportation from one place to another quicker, but I think the evironment, your body, you wallet, and your peace of mind is better off without them.

Yesterday my car wouldn't start, and I was stuck at FedEx for thirty minutes trying to find someone to come pick me up. No one was answering their phone. Apparently class or work or whatever else they were doing was more important than helping me out with my car. I know, ridiculous. Finally I got hold of a kind soul to come pick me up. My car was left there and later that day, another kind soul went with me to jump it. It started, but didn't last me very long. Apparently something is wrong with my alternator, whatever that means. I don't know about cars. So I go to my car again today with the intention of going somewhere to get some mantenence help, but of course, it doesn't start. So of course I start crying. I sit there in my car for a little bit, feeling sorry for myself, and then walk back up to my apartment, giving myself a pep talk along to way. At least I even have a car to stress about, I tell myself. Most people in the world don't. And it's just a car. I have a good life if this my biggest problem right now. And at least I have a good bike to fall back on, and nice roommates. I then decided to forget about my car for a little while and rode my bike to Common Grounds to unwind with a Frozen Milky Way. That's where I am now. It's really hot outside, so I was very sweaty by the time I got here, but it's nice to be here now.

I know--eventually I'm going to have to do something about my car. I just don't feel like thinking about it right now. Ok? Leave me alone.


So I took over three hundred pictures while I was away, but have uploaded 146 to an album on snapfish that you can view by clicking here. On this same snapfish account are other albums from people who went to Africa with me; we are putting all our pictures up so we can share them. Eventually I'll put my pictures up on facebook too, but for now they are at snapfish. Enjoy.


edit: Phew, I just put up all my pictures on facebook. That was quite a feat.